Are you losing your temper with your baby, toddler, or teen? Have you become an impatient mom? Here are 7 simple, yet effective ways to stop yelling, be nicer to your child, and bond with them! These exercises will help you to become a more patient loving parent!
I am a mom of two tiny little humans! More specifically, a baby and a toddler. They are absolutely adorable, but exhausting! They are into everything! And my toddler wants to do the exact opposite of everything I say.
I’ve always considered myself to be a very patient person. I’m fine letting people cut in front of me while driving. I don’t mind a little longer line at the grocery store. I do fine waiting for others to get ready when we have plans.
So why am I having so much trouble with patience with my little ones?
Maybe, because I’m the Stay at Home Mom. I’m with them 24/7. All day. Every day. I wake up, they need stuff. I get one something and the other one falls. Every day is a big struggle to get them fed, diapered, loved, and entertained!
I hardly get a moment for MYSELF!
Some days, my husband would get home and I would just start crying! I couldn’t believe that I was losing it!
I never thought I’d be a parent who yelled, but my toddler has been testing my patience lately! And getting him to listen has been a nightmare!
I needed helpful positive parenting solutions to make me a more patient loving mom… A sane, happy, healthy, loving, patient mom.
(Sounds like a fairy tale, but it is possible!)
So, after weeks of praying for more patience, and meditating for answers… I’ve come up with 7 simple ways to be a more patient loving mom (That really work!)
7 Effective Ways to be More Patient and Loving with Your Children
When You Start Getting Angry or Frustrated, Take a 90-Second Time Out
Kids are trying, plain and simple. They are curious, learning, impatient, and don’t know how to express emotions well. They test boundaries and want your attention.
When you start getting angry, frustrated, or ready to yell – Stop and take a 90-second breather… Patient parents know when they need a minute.
It is hard to make a healthy parenting choice when both you and your child are frustrated. If you can, step away for a quick 90-second breather. Take calm, deep breaths before you negatively react to your child.
If you can’t step away from your child (like in the grocery store), put your head down and take a few deep breaths before reacting.
Taking a 10-second break to deeply breathe is a method taught in anger management. I like to do a longer 90 seconds to really center and focus myself before yelling or reacting inappropriately with my children.
Anger overrides your calm, rational mind and turns you into a reactionary parent. We want to take the time to make an informed, calm choice in dealing with child frustrations.
Breathing gives you the time to RESPOND to your child’s behavior, rather than REACT out of haste, frustration, or anger.
Reset Your Gratitude and Strengthen Your Love for Your Child
It’s hard to remember you love your child when they’re pushing your buttons!
After taking the 90-second breather, try this simple visualization exercise that takes just a few moments.
Close your eyes while still deeply breathing.
Now, visualize all the beautiful, cute, funny things your kid has done recently!
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For example, my toddler is Potty Training and it is hard! But he keeps putting his underwear on backwards and his cute little butt cheeks hang out the bottom!
It is hilarious! And it makes me laugh and be grateful for him every time I get frustrated with potty training.
You may be struggling to find anything your child has done that’s been cute or funny recently. But if you think long enough, it’ll come to you.
It can be something as simple as a hug, a smile, or them sharing their snack with you!
Be a More Patient Parent by Finding Common Ground with Your Child
It doesn’t matter how old your kid is, you, as a parent need to find common ground with them.
This helps not only your child, but you as well.
Find things to do together, that you both enjoy! And let them help you do things they’re interested in!
According to PositiveParentingSolutions.com, the best thing you can do to improve your children’s behavior is to spend some time with them individually every day.
They say spending just 10 – 15 minutes a day per child will show measurable improvement almost immediately!
My toddler loves to “help” cook, do the dishes, laundry, and put away the groceries! A lot of times he just thwarts me, but it’s important to let kids try to help!
You may bond with your baby and toddler by tickling or chasing them, both of my kids love it! A tween or teen may enjoy watching a show or sports game that you like as well.
They may also like camping, fishing, or helping you plan meals and snacks. Just find something you both enjoy doing and do more of that!
Kids will test your boundaries and patience a lot less, when you are spending quality time with them.
We can either spend our time doing quality things with our child. Or spend our time dealing with the negative behavior they exhibit trying to get our attention.
Either way, we spend the time. Choose wisely.
Trust me, there are many things both you and your child will enjoy doing together!
Make sure to spend the time figuring out what these things are! It is so worth it!
When Frustrations Run High with Your Children, Change the Scenery
Energy gets stuck in buildings, and kids especially, feel it. When areas are cluttered, it is easy to get frustrated easy.
Kids can turn a clean home into a disaster area within minutes and put you on edge! If you have a baby or toddler, take them outside whenever possible!
Nature calms and re-energizes us! You will all feel calmer walking barefoot on the grass… Or taking a walk around the neighborhood.
If it’s winter, you can change the scenery by running to the store, gas station, library, grandparents or friends house!
Even switching to a different room of your house will help ease the tension and diffuse the situation. If you are having a hard time calming your baby or toddler, jump in the tub with them.
Water is very calming and relaxing. Whenever I’m feeling particularly riled up, jumping in the shower or tub instantly eases the tension. It is the same with children.
If you have a tween or teen, ask them if they want to go visit a family member or take a walk with you.
Maybe they want to run and pick up a smoothie or practice their driving skills in an empty parking lot! Find common ground! Change the scenery!
When You’re Struggling to Be Nice to Your Child, Teach them a New Skill
Babies and toddlers especially get bored very easily!
You can teach your baby to roll, sit, crawl, stand, or use sign language.
You can practice words, sounds, colors, and shapes with your toddler. You can teach them to dress themselves or fasten their shoes.
Teach them to open their own juice box or put away dishes. Or, you can download a new educational app to play together!
You’ll instill confidence in yourself and your child by teaching them something new! Get them to try a new food or help wash veggies for dinner!
My toddler loves helping to wash veggies for smoothies and learning mommy’s dance moves! He and I also both love practicing catching and throwing balls. We have a blast!
Teaching your kids new things helps their brains develop. It also helps them be more independent. Dependent children are needy and whiny. Teach them new things and let them spill, fail, and learn!
Then practice encouraging and supporting them to keep trying!
If you have a tween or teen, teach them to drive, shave, cook, or meditate! Keep finding common ground and ways to spend time together that you both enjoy!
Patient Parents Schedule Much Needed Time Away from Their Children
Take time for yourself! Sometimes as parents, we try to give all we have to our kids, leaving nothing for ourselves!
It’s like the old saying goes, “Give yourself the oxygen in the plane first, then help your child.” Make sure your needs are met first.
Part of taking care of yourself, is spending time on things you love to do without your kids! I take at least an hour of mommy time after my kids go to bed.
I bought a Shiatsu Massager from Amazon that is A-m-a-z-i-n-g! I sit in my rocking chair, have a relaxing tea, watch an adult show, and massage my shoulders. I relax and take care of my needs!
My son goes to his grandparents one day a week, so I can get some much-needed ME time. It isn’t selfish to need time for yourself. You will be a much more patient loving parent when you are taken care of!
You can share babysitting with women in your neighborhood. Ask their grandparents, aunts, friends, or your spouse to watch your kids while you go exercise, get a massage or go see a movie with a friend.
Take your kids to a daycare, or use your gym daycare. Even once every two weeks will make a huge difference in your mental health and well-being.
You will miss your kids when you take breaks from them! They’ll be easier to love and you’ll want to spend quality time with them when they come home.
You’ll have much more patience with your children when your needs are met.
Win, win win!
Find More Patience and Gratitude for Your Kids by Journaling
This answer came to me during Meditation when I asked for more patience with my children.
Journal your parenting experiences. Take a page from Clint Eastwood and journal The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly!
Journaling helps you process and let go of the bad parenting days. But, on the flip side, it helps you appreciate and be grateful for the good parenting experiences!
Don’t forget to include what is going on in your life on days you get super frustrated or mad. Do you have PMS? A cold? Has it been raining every day for two weeks and you’ve been stuck in the house with your kids?
Writing it out helps you figure out what is causing the tension and come up with solutions to try before you explode.
Make sure to journal all the cute, funny, adorable things your kids do! You can re-read these later to strengthen the bond you have with your child and help with your visualization exercise!
Also, you can write letters to your children, letting them know how proud you are of them, what you want them to know, and how they’ve changed your life for the better!
Then, you can read the letters to your children before bed and give them to them in a beautiful keepsake book!
However you want to do it, writing out your feelings and experiences helps you let go, process, deal with, and be aware of them. This will make you a better, loving, more patient parent!
Did you enjoy this article? Please comment or share below! Have you tried these positive parenting solutions for more patience with your baby, toddler, tween, or teen? How have they helped you? Do you have any other solutions to have more patience with your children? Please comment below!
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